Since this will never be seen since my blog isn’t popular I might as well poor out my heart.

  I have Social anxiety but you could say in the medium form? I speak my feelings in words and that is how it will always be but since I’m so quiet I watch more than I interact and I’ve seen inspected the great painting of Earth to discover it’s many faults. 

  Everyone doesn’t seem to care that there is in fact a little boy blocks away from your house dying. You do not know him and he does not know you and you two will never meet.

 Long ago this boy was born on a cold January day in 2000. The age of the future. Born into the perfect American dream with money, a beautiful family and only one fault. He was African-American but that didn’t matter. He was a child; like the rest of us. 

   A beautiful dark past lay behind him and he was ready to create someone else’s history. Though there were laws in this world he was brought into.

1. You are the government, you are a product of a country’s success and a country’s history. If you’re country is not known for succeeding and you in fact succeed. You will become either a. the target of racial comedy and hatred. b. A great prodigy who lifts their country.

2. If you are born into a country but of a different background you are considered a threat, Those who are safe are the Caucasian. If your country is in a deep crisis you will be both the victim and the prosecuted. 

3. If you are Caucasian you have the power to change the world. Dominating the world from the beginning you will always be the good one. For from a young age children are taught to look towards you. 

4. Affection towards the same sex is in fact not equal to affection towards the opposite sex. We believe in order not love.

5. Not in any way or form are  you allowed to speak out.

 He established the rules through life and did not agree with any of it. Though, he feared for his life to speak out. One night as he sat with his family in front of their television he thought of what life had turned into. 

  Mother searched for other jobs. The company she worked for had been bought by another and she was one of the many that were ‘randomly’ chosen to be let go. She was one of the brightest; she had a Business degree from Oxford University. She was denied each time and barely given a chance to speak as she was asked unsettling questions.

"Has there been any criminal activity in your family whatsoever?"

"Is Hannah your real name?"

 ”Are you still married?”

    Father tried to pick up the pieces after he was wrongly accused of a robbery. He was in fact the victim but the watch that was stolen was so expensive he was accused.

  All that was left his mother, sister and himself.

 The news drawled on and he left for his room. He switched his laptop on and scrolled through the media on his phone. He was surprised to see the news of Ferguson, Missouri.

It was uncalled for and horrifying but no one…seemed to care. It bothered him because this was he was brought into. A world so bent on perfection; the perfect blank white paper. A small drop of ink and they would ferociously attempt to destroy it.

   This was not the first incident of a crime like this being overlooked. Michael Brown was unarmed and he was killed; though the only problem the world sees is that the town was rioting. A child of God has been murdered! 

   Everyday he saw the government laugh and smile about equality. Then why was any human allowed to buy acres of land, cars they would never drive, clothes they would only wear once, keep millions and millions and money just to sit there and look pretty/! Why all this and yet they were allowed to see the monster the world has become because of hatred, because of fear, because of neglect! 

 He had to hide his love for the boy next door because to others it was wrong. Though they say;

"Do what you want to do I just think it’s gross" 

Was that meant to make him feel better. That because he fell in love he was gross?

Months passed and mother never found a job; Father died of sickness in jail and his sister was (thankfully) adopted  by another family. He ate from the trash and dreamed of a world where he was allowed to be happy.

  I am not the only one who sees this!

 This is not a speech of race equality or gender equality or whatever kind of equality it’s about happiness! Why are we deprived from the right to be happy. Why is it that now, when someone receives a gift we have to force a smile?!

  Why do we ignore the fact that we are slaves to the illusion that this is all okay. Why have the comedy shows thrived off of hurtful words?! Why do we teach our children that there is only a certain type of love is okay. That if someone does something bad they are not corrected they are killed. That everyone’s life depends on what the government thinks is okay. What the money thinks is okay.

  I hate walking down the halls and my friends making ‘jokes’ about how I disappear in the dark. I am unable to stand for myself because it just seems like my race is whining? 

  Why does the color of my skin decide what I eat, my facial features, who I talk to, my grades, my level of academic success, how I talk, how I walk, my physical appearance, how I look at the world? WHY CAN’T I BE HAPPY?! 

When has joy and laughter become a crime. When did gs and sex become more important than the smiles on your families face; or the bubbling laughter of your soul. 

  I am born into the world were being happy and looking, feeling, acting or seeming the same is wrong. Where children no older than 8 complain because of the lack of wifi, not the lack of swings.

  I am only 13 and I still considered a child; but I like to think my eyes have grown ahead of me and I understand the world better than the adults. I just want you to also.